These days, I get the impression that patience is a quality that everyone wishes they had, but is incapable of possessing. We live in a world where everything moves very (too) fast, and patience is no longer really necessary. From social networking sites to fast-food restaurants, no one waits; everything is instantaneous. Yet not everything has changed, which is why it's so important to cultivate this incredible quality.
What is patience?
The dictionary offers three very interesting definitions:
- Ability not to get upset by difficulties, to put up with failures, mistakes, etc.
- Quality of someone who knows how to wait calmly
- Perseverance, persistence in doing something, pursuing a goal
Patience is therefore an excellent quality, which encourages us to wait calmly and persistently for the outcome of a situation. Patience is often not innate. We can easily observe impatience in young children, who want everything, right away! However, as we grow up, we soon learn that for many things, being patient is worth the effort.
Like any quality, patience can be learned, and must be practiced. Patience is often taught to children by asking them to wait their turn for a toy or for the meal to be ready. Humans tend to learn quite easily when there's something to "gain" at the end of the learning process. And even if we don't necessarily all agree on the validation of this method of education, I'm sure we've all used this "technique" at least once.
As adults, we have a duty (to ourselves and to others) to work on our patience. Obviously, it's important to take things one step at a time. If you're not used to being patient, start out slowly. Here are a few simple examples. Prepare a sourdough pizza dough, and wait an entire night before eating it. Plant a seed and watch it grow. Go out into nature, and wait quietly for an animal to pass by. Get up early enough to watch the sunrise, etc.
Does losing patience really mean losing the battle?
When we lose patience, we become de facto impatient, which is considered a "bad" quality. Why is that? When we're impatient, we're egocentric about our needs, our desires, our problems. We tend not to take into account the reasons why our need has not yet been satisfied. Impatience often leads to poor decision-making, with sometimes dramatic consequences.
Obviously, there are different levels of impatience, depending on the situation. Losing patience doesn't necessarily mean losing the battle, it certainly means changing the battle. When a parent loses patience with a child, there's a good chance that what happens next won't be the ideal response. When we lose patience at work, at school or in the family, we change the dynamic that has been established. Patience leads to much more tolerance, reflection and, in the long run, more respect and love. In my opinion, this is desperately needed in today's society.
Learning to be patient opens the door to a new universe. Allowing us to dream big, while knowing that we'll surely have to be patient. Patience with ourselves, our loved ones, our friends, our colleagues, our bosses, our neighbors, drastically changes our relationships, for the better.
In what area do you think you need to work on your patience? (Professional, family, personal, environmental...)
"To lose patience is to lose the battle. "
Mahatma Gandhi
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